On the loss of a loved one…

26 Aug

I got a call from my mom earlier today, letting me know that her dog, Tabitha, had been put to sleep this morning.  I called Tabitha my puppy sister.  She was a gift to my mom when I was 15 from my brother.  He gave her to my mom, and her actual sister to his wife.  It turned out that both puppies had Parvo.  After lots of veterinary care, Tabitha was able to come home with us.  Her sister, however, didn’t make it.  I’ve always wondered what it would have been like with two of them around…

I digress.  Tabby was getting old.  She was around 13 1/2, and just in poor overall health.  Her sight was failing, she was hard of hearing, she was losing her teeth.  My mom says she had known for a while that it was coming.  In fact, the last time she took Tater, as we sometimes called her, to the vet, my mom told her that it was probably the last time she was going to have to endure the torture of a bath and haircut.  (Tater wasn’t a big fan of being groomed.)

Last night she had rotisserie chicken for dinner.  A few bites, anyway.  She hadn’t been eating her dog food, and that was my mom’s way of enticing her to eat.  This morning, she was bleeding out of her mouth.  It turns out that her kidneys were failing, her lungs were full of fluid, and her body was just shutting down.  And so it was done.

I haven’t lived in the same house as Tabitha in a decade, but she’s still “the family dog”, and I’m still feeling the loss as if she were my own.  It’s made for a weepy, miserable day.  And do you know what makes weepy, miserable days better?


Lots of delicious, bad for you food.

I’ve managed to not indulge, though, other than a sliver of cake for my boss’s birthday.  And I do mean sliver.  I could have carried the entire quarter sheet cake into my studio and eaten it all, but instead I opted for a tiny plate with what turned out to be about four bites of cake on it.

I admittedly did go back later for more, and thankfully, it was gone.  Other than that, I’ve been astonishingly good today.  Which is nothing short of a miracle, considering that all I want to do is cry into a brownie bottom sundae.

I even attempted the gym, but I was bamboozled.  I went for a dance fusion class, but the instructor was out.  In his place was a very perky Zumba instructor, and dammit her music choices were just too happy for me to deal with.  So I only got a 20-minute workout instead of an hour.  But I’m not going to get down on myself.  Leaving the gym early to come play and cuddle with own dogs was completely worth it.


One Response to “On the loss of a loved one…”

  1. Lisa August 26, 2010 at 2:10 pm #

    Totally understandable. When I’m frustrated, sad, upset, tired, or just plain bored, food makes it better.

    The only thing that trumps that is love from my doggy. 🙂

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